I Surprise Even Myself
I pulled up this blog opportunity and then suddenly forgot why???? I knew a few minutes ago what was on my mind, but then my thoughts vanished like fingerprints on a mirror after cleaning. I had to walk through thoughts that were still intact to ascertain any clues and after totally moving away from worrying about it, suddenly my focus re-arrived at the door of my awareness.
My awareness of symptoms for my dementia are intermittent. But here are a few new or interesting bits and pieces.
MEDICAL TEST RESULTS
I've had an MRI, a Brain Scan, a PET Scan and a scan of my thyroid.
My GP and Geriatrician have had contact with me at various outcome points and here are the bits and pieces they shared thus far...
1. GP - I have two small cysts in my frontal lobe of my brain (brain scan and MRI). They shouldn't be causing the problems I'm suffering. They may repeat the tests in time to see if the cysts are growing. He also indicated tests evidence I've had a mild stroke.
Denise, Anna and I were together the day that probably happened, years ago. We'd planned and were on a boat launch to do some kayaking (Vancouver Island). As we moved slowly down the ramp toward the kayaks, I blacked out, fell and upon awakening discovered I'd injured a knee (split it open to the bone and had to be taken to ER). It took literally hours and hours to be seen by a Dr. but eventually the knee was sewn up and questions about the incident indicated I'd probably had a stroke. No one did anything about it and I didn't pursue it.
NOTES:
Over the years, my blood pressure problems have given black outs more than once. It is possible some of those events are part of the damage they are seeing now. I know Lewy Body Dementia cannot be seen in these tests until it is much more evident in the brain and in my disabilities. I'm not worrying about it, just moving forward.
CYSTS... Rayanne stated to me ..."Mom, they don't get it!" She said the cysts are like pebbles in your shoes. They are small, but shouldn't keep you from walking, yet they make each footstep uncomfortable and unpredictable. I wish the doctor could see it that way, but meanwhile, we keep pressing forward.
Denise (RN) said the location of the cysts truly is indicative of some of my symptoms because they are in the frontal lobe..
2. GERIATRICIAN - The PET scan evidences there are issues in my frontal lobe. He isn't certain, but I may have indicators of Frontotemperal Lobe Dementia - but he's not sure. He doesn't want to determine that because the "outcome is so displeasing" (his words not mine).
(Geri note: It can't be anymore displeasing than Lewy Body Dementia. AND, no matter any diagnosis, my optimism exceeds any possible negative outcomes. Do I sound like I'm giving up my "geriness" yet? I DON'T THINK SO...!!!)
He'll once again ask for the memory testing for me for individuals with a high IQ (mine is 137-38). Somehow they have overlooked that request earlier when I told both doctors I'd flunked the cookie cutter test the first time it was given. I made certain, by carefully file folding in my brain the areas I needed to beef up for the next time. The Geriatrician wasn't certain that was possible, but when you give a person the same test three times in six months, if that person is Geri, IT IS POSSIBLE!
SYMPTOM NOTES:
I've reviewed the list of symptoms and smile when I see items listed that are very familiar to me but may not be obvious to observers. Rayanne can see more of the symptoms than a casual appointment with a physician and Denise certainly voiced symptoms seen before I left UTAH last year. (It may have been longer ago!!!!).
No, I haven't had a sudden urge to eat my shoes, but I truly do have a desire to eat dirt. That is something I ate while pregnant with Denise. I used to lick potatoe peelings. Now I lick my fingers when the urge hits me after gardening or doing other outside dusty work.
I had a new kind of hallucination recently that brought Rayanne to tears.
She was driving us home in the dark and suddenly as the road was obviously offering a turn, my brain told me Rayanne was about to drive in the opposing direction to the turn. I stiffened and yelled out her name in a panic voice She was immediately traumatized and then we both realized I was hallucinating and she was not driving off the road. I began apologizing endlessly as she cried and cried, still driving.
We made an agreement for future moments of possible hallucinations. If I sensed something was wrong, I was NOT to call out and we'd simply deal with the realities. As funny as it sounds, just yesterday such an incident arose. She appeared to be driving into the metal barrier in my side of the lane of traffic, along the edge of a mountain cliff. I stayed quiet, she caught herself and pulled the car back into the centre of the lane and all was well. I reminded her I'd been a "good girl" and I hadn't called out. She thanked me and we laughed.
I'll bet you recall using one of these sometime at school.
I loved it much better than a dictionary. But with a dictionary you had to have
an idea of how to spell what you were looking for, Thesaurus was
my best "cheat" friend and always has been.
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A few of you have commented that I don't seem to suffer for a shortage of words (when reading my blog). The funny reality is, I sit with a very old Roget's Thesaurus at my right arm, and I use it liberally. Can't do that in conversation and so I'll laughingly try to describe the word I'm looking for and Rayanne eventually comes to my rescue. Now that I have fewer conversations with people, perhaps Blogging will become my new "claim to fame!"
I can't recall again, if I told you in my last blog that I couldn't consistently recall that I'd just experienced a holiday week on the Island.
AND in conjunction with that, I was having some difficulty with my having transferred my Koodoo account over to Telus. I had all the details in place as I bantered with the service rep. My only shortfall was I was certain I'd completed the transaction with Rayanne at my side in Lethbridge. After the details were resolved, Rayanne took multiple assertions that SHE HAD NOT HELPED ME IN LETHBRIDGE. She repeatedly and quietly said I'd done it while on the Island two weeks earlier. And when the foggy picture finally formed in my brain, it was Carolyn , on the Island, who had been at my side to take care of it all.
One additional irritation I must mention is my increasing problem with swallowing. A year ago it might have been once in a while, now it more often then not. Laugh again, but Nathan had an incident while I was on the Island wherein Rayanne had to shift him from Cardston to Lethbridge and then by ambulance to Calgary's ER. He had food stuck down where the bronchial and esophagus meet. It took a few hours, I'm told to remove the food, but he came home the next morning after scaring Rayanne half to death. He's had such emergencies numerous times and I've been on hand often to see him through it.
My incidents are that the food (well chewed - unlike Nat) can't seem to smoothly go down my esophagus. It may last for minutes or hours. I sip fluids repeatedly to grease the runway, but that doesn't seem to solve the problem. So... if you hear I choked to death, you will know I didn't choke on my words but on some tasty goodie.
You may laugh. I often smile during an episode and I may have told you of the first time it was totally out of control while at the dining table at the Lodge. I've come a long way. Now I can deal with it, minus an audience.
Yep, I keep surprising myself. I'd say more, but I've run out of amusing and perhaps trivial things to tell you. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving Weekend. .
Goodbye one and all!
